I hate myself.

Now I regret it.

I don’t even know why, but I’m clouded with tribulation. It had just popped up recently, no idea why.

Watching you grow up from afar, there’s no doubt you’ve changed but you still keep the same attitude and you still seem sincere.

I still regret it. I should have just chosen you. I was a fool, I know. Cliche, but every time this particular song comes up, I can’t help but think of you.

I promised my twin to stop a certain vice, but I want to do it once more for the last time, and that last time will hopefully rid you from my thoughts which keeps me sleepless at night. I loved you, but even at that age, I was a fool. I didn’t know what I wanted, and I still don’t, currently. And I wont for a while, if not, ever.

But I hope you’re okay.

I can’t really ask because we’ve been absent from each others lives for quite a while now and last time I heard of you was when you took up the same vices as I did.

It’s hard to describe how I feel currently, but lets just say its content dabbed with sadness. I just can’t get over my mistake.

I miss you.

Very, very much.

We knew what we did to each other and how we affected each other, yet I failed to comprehend how significant that was. I guess the lesson is learned, never compromise distance and settle for what you have that id closer to you physically. Now all I can do is vicariously think up of how we may ended up if we were together, if I did choose you, if I wasn’t such a fool.

I do love you. Every little piece of you.

But it’s much too late for that.