Synonym.

- The lack thereof makes this entry title-less so I decided that this re-used picture would reflect it better.

Its the same feeling.

Same pain, same adrenaline, same paranoia that hits when I ask myself that same question.

“なんとためにさけびつずけ? なんとためにしんでゆく？”
For what do we keep shouting? For what do we die?

More specifically, where you the one?

I treasure the resources, the time spent, the memories made.

But I care more of the contribution that you gave that eventually influenced my development as a person.

Eight years. Eight years we were together. During those eight years were critical to my development of who I am. It gave me the confidence I have today. It gave me the right, the abilities, the potential and most importantly the control of character that I don’t think I would have achieved without you. With the abrupt ending, I found myself clueless and everything that I’ve learned was stripped away.

And now, since you’re not around, there’s no way of checking if I’m within the right boundaries or not. And there’s no way of asking you since you’re gone.
I had no clue how your mind worked, but it was brilliant.
We were on the same wavelength, and that’s the only guideline I have.

The only reason I try to stay on the same wavelength is to find another that has  yours.

As hard as that may be, I will keep looking as long as there’s time. And that is something I have plenty of.

Building bridges, confirming feelings, finding friends are no problem. Its just that one little trait and character that’s hard to find.

Were you the one?

It will still bother me, even if I’m with someone else.

What if she was?

What if I’ve stolen someone else’s?

“If it wasn’t meant to be, then it wasn’t meant to be.”

That sort of thing doesn’t apply to what happened to you.

Am I satisfied with myself as a person?

I don’t need anyone else to confirm what I’m worthy of.

Thanks to you.